Family Encyclopedia >> Entertainment

The Force Awakens 25 Alternative Names for Star Wars VII [Weird &Wonderful Web]

Star Wars is back. The new film, titled The Force Awakens, is the first in a new trilogy set 30 years after the events of Return Of The Jedi, and will be released on December 18, 2015. The name was revealed on Last Day Shooting, with the following tweet making headlines around the world..

However, The Force Awakens has, as a title, left a lot of people disappointed. They claim that it is boring, predictable and that it can mean the J.J. The Abrams reboot is set to start off slow. So, unhappy with Disney's decided title, the Internet suggested its own alternatives, 25 of which are listed below.

Clickbait Wars

A classic clickbait headline used to great effect there, and admit it, you'd be more inclined to watch Star Wars VII if that was the title.

Poor chewie

A play on the words from the title of the 2009 film, He Just Not That Into You. The question is, who doesn't like Chewbacca? Has Han Solo left him? Do not say that he is not like that.

Not Han Solo!

Well, you've convinced me, I'm going to see Star Wars VII. Harrison Ford is a national treasure, and I'm not sure how many more bones he can break before he can't anymore.

Starring Snoop Dogg

A pun on the song, Drop It Like It's Hot by Snoop Dogg and Pharrell. Ironically, Hoth isn't all that hot, being a planet covered in snow and ice. So there.

Star Wars reality

I'll be honest and admit that he would be much more likely to watch Keeping Up with the Calissians than the Kardashians. And Lando didn't even need a sex tape to become famous.

Paternity test

A little game about How I Met Your Mother, supposedly, but who pronounces this sentence? Luke's mother died a long time ago, so this would require a major plot overhaul.

Escape Escapes

A play on the title of the novel The Fault in Our Stars by John Green. This works on several levels, because the Death Star had a flaw in its design.

Friends forever

What line? Who knows. But a Friends/Star Wars mash-up would be awesome. Monika would be the villain, obviously.

Not starring Hugh Grant

This is an extraordinarily creative play on the words from the title of the 1995 movie, The Englishman Who Went Up a Hill But Came Down a Mountain. Starring Hugh Grant. Oh dear.

Admirable anagram

I hope everyone reading this has the means to work out the anagram without my having to explain it. Quite literally.

I am groot

This may seem like nothing more than a subtle search for the possibilities of Star Wars:The Force Awakens sucking, but there is a hidden truth there; Guardians Of The Galaxy is going to be tough to beat.

Lucas Lucre

I'm not sure DVDs will be around in 25 years, but that may not be the point. Let's hope Disney respects the originals more than George Lucas. That's an illusion, I know..

Frighteningly accurate

Harrison Ford is 72 years old, Mark Hamill is 63 years old, and even Carrie Fisher is 58 years old. This title may be painfully true..

Why bother?

Yes, you're right, I will, you will, and all other Star Wars fans. 10 Twitter accounts. All Star Wars fans must follow. 10 Twitter accounts. The Star Wars and Indiana Jones franchises. For a fraction of over $4 billion, Disney got hold of the Star Wars franchise and quickly announced... Read More So why bother?!

My eyes!!!

JJ Abrams is a fantastic filmmaker, but he goes a little overboard with the lens. Let's hope The Force Awakens isn't so shattered..

Stormtrooper Academy

This is a reference to Police Academy 4:Citizens on Patrol, one of the worst movies you can see. Let's hope Star Wars VII turns out better than that steaming pile of horse droppings.

Record of box office shots

Enough is enough, just get the movie out in theaters so I can go see it. And be disappointed. And damn George Lucas, Disney and J.J. Abrams all the way home.


If the force is anything like the rest of us, you won't want to get out of bed for a few minutes after your alarm goes off.

Mocking Mickey

A somewhat sarcastic reference to Steamboat Willie, the first Walt Disney short to feature Mickey Mouse. And now I want to see a remake with the cast of Chewbacca in the lead role.

Cast iron cage

A very clever play on the words from the title of the 2001 movie, Captain Corelli's Mandolin. Starring a Nicolas Cage. Please give him a cameo in Star Wars, J.J., the internet demands it.

Millennium Munchies

This is a reference to Harold &Kumar Go to White Castle, and suggests that Han and Luke are a couple of drug addicts who need some food after getting high. Stranger things have happened.

Culture shock

With this combination of a quote from Return Of The Jedi and the title of the 2008 movie, Slumdog Millionaire, I'm now imagining a Bollywood version of Star Wars. And it's cheerful.

Woah, Darth!

A remake of the excellent Bill and Ted adventure with the titular Bill and Ted played by C-3PO and R2-D2? I'm in.

Binks Begone

There are plenty of suggestions for titles featuring Jar Jar Binks, and none that are particularly complementary to the character who ruined the prequel trilogy. This is my personal favorite.

Old Geeks

That's a bit harsh, but who are we kidding, it's also true. Star Wars was once the best thing we've ever had, and now it's just another Disney franchise, and we're all old. Damn you, J.J. Abrams, damn Ryloth.!

Suggest your own title for Star Wars VII!

You've seen our selection of the alternate names for Star Wars Episode VII, but do you have any better suggestions? Choose your favorite from the #BetterStarWarsTitles and #RejectedStarWarsTitles hashtags on Twitter, or, better yet, conjure up an original one from your own soft gray matter. Either way, leave a comment below telling us what Star Wars VII would be called if Disney had left the decision entirely up to you.